Catholic Wedding Vows and Their Meanings
Published June 3, 2020
I ______ take you ______ to be my lawful wife/husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
For practicing Catholics, these vows will be familiar. It’s a standard Catholic wedding vow used in most parts of the US. Even if you haven’t been to a Catholic wedding, you’ve probably heard this in some Hollywood romcoms.
Many young Catholic girls are also looking forward to the day they’ll finally say those vows to the person they love. But despite their familiarity, not all Catholics know the meaning behind those vows. Or why it needs to be included in every Catholic wedding ceremony.
If you’re getting married soon, here are some things you need to know about Catholic wedding vows.
The Significance of Wedding Vows
Weddings are sacred affairs for Catholics. It’s more than just binding two people in matrimony. It’s also about making a promise before God and before man.
This is why vows are central to every Catholic wedding rite. According to the teachings of the Catholic Church, the exchange of vows mainly signify consent. It means that they give themselves to and accept the gift of each other. Without consent from both parties, there can be no wedding.
Aside from consent, wedding vows also signify the couple’s promise to each other. And they made that commitment in front of their families, the community, and most importantly to God. This gives more credence to their promises and makes it more binding.
What The Vows Mean
The standard Catholic wedding vow contains six pledges. This is what each of them means:
I ________ take you to be my lawful wife/husband…
This is pretty self-explanatory. It signifies your acceptance of each other as man and wife under the law of man and of God.
…. to have and to hold from this day forward
Technically speaking, “to have and to hold” means having possession of something and holding on to it. Yes, it denotes ownership. But not in the way you are thinking.
You see, when you own something, you’ll take care of it and treasure it. You won’t let it come to any harm. That’s the kind of promise you make to your spouse when you utter these words. You are making a commitment to take care of them and protect them from today and in the days to come.
… for better, for worse
Marriage is not the happy ending that many people think it is. Rather, it’s the start of a roller-coaster journey that you take with the other person. Every marriage has its ups and downs. That’s why you are making a promise to be there for your spouse not just in better times but also during the difficult ones.
… for richer, for poorer
Throughout your marriage, there will always be moments when you’ll have nothing. In fact, most married couple fights stem from money – or the lack thereof. But being there for each other when you have nothing to eat or no house to sleep in is what marriage is about.
… in sickness and in health
We won’t always be as healthy as the day we get married. As we grow older, we become more prone to sickness. It’s one of the realities of marriage you need to face. When you make this vow, you’re telling the whole world that you’ll stick by your spouse’s side no matter their state of health. It’s just like how God never abandons us in times of sickness. He is there for us until we’re back on our feet again.
… until death do us part
Out of all the vows, this is probably the most famous phrase. It also makes a fitting end to the vows as it wraps up all the promises you’ve made. It signifies that marriage is a sacred commitment that you have to honor for a lifetime.
Other Versions of Wedding Vows
The vow above is just a version widely used in the US. But across the world, vows may vary. There’s nothing wrong with using a different version as long as it’s approved by the church.
One of the most common version goes like this:
I __________ take you __________ to be my wife/husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.
There’s no need to worry if you can’t memorize this. In certain cases, the priest will lead the exchanging of vows and the couple will just have to answer with the iconic “I do”.
Seek a Deeper Connection with God and Join Lay Cistercians of South Florida
Lay Cistercians of South Florida, is a community of lay people who seeks to have a deeper connection with God by living a life inspired by the monks and nuns through Lay Monasticism. Learn more about what is a Lay Cistercian on our website. Anyone who aspires to do the same as us, and is a confirmed Catholic is welcome to join us! We meet every second Saturday of the month at Emmanuel Catholic Church in Delray Beach, Florida.
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About The Author
Judy Ponio is a professional writer for the Lay Cistercians blog and a devoted Catholic. She works hard to ensure her work uses accurate facts by cross checking reputable sources.
