Healthy Monastic Practices Anyone Can Do

The monk is supposed to stay with their same community all their life. If they have difficulties with each other they are supposed to work it out. The inevitable friction that every community experiences between people of different backgrounds and quirks provides the opportunity for the monks to practice what they preach in loving and praying for “enemies” and doing good to everyone, even those they dislike. 

In practice this is easier said than done. 

 

“No one is to do what they judge better for themselves but rather what is better for the other” RB 72. Part of the goal of spiritual maturity is gaining the virtue of Obedience. This not only means obeying the abbot but also their fellow monk. In a family this has exactly the same application. 

When I first learned about this I cringed at what it meant for me as a wife of a husband I often did not agree with. But as I put this into practice I found that I argued less with him and prayed more. The result was a more harmonious household and better family decision making. 

 

This is the description of this vow from Sister Katherine who wrote the book “A Life of Hope” page 49 “We vow to live a simple, celibate life according to the customs of our monastery and to be always open to change and grow. We are to accept with contentment the basic monastic regimen of our community and live our community decisions in a cooperative spirit. Above all, we must always be willing to ask forgiveness, to change our way of thinking and behaving, and to learn new and more loving ways of relating to others.” This can be applied to any family and office community. I have often envisioned a growing plant when pondering this vow. As we get older we become better when we can live in harmony with the people with whom God has planted us.